We think it’s love at the beginning but in reality it’s not

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The other day a friend called me and when i picked the phone call, he started crying! I kept quite for a minute after asked him whats not happening? The first thing he said ‘its like she no longer loves me, whenever i call she can’t pick, sometimes she replies my texts after five days or more”.

In the beginning we love almost everything about our boyfriends/girlfriends but overtime that can change. Yet in some relationships the loss of love isn’t just over a few things we don’t like, it goes much deeper.

Relationships go through natural movements and that isn’t always a bad thing. These changes can be cause for concern, however, and so many Men want to know if she doesn’t love him anymore.

So how do you know if the changes in the love you’re experiencing are normal or a problem? If you find yourself wondering. Then you should know that, yes, there certainly can be.

When you in any relationship, we forgive and forget their mistakes, don’t believe the bad things they think about themselves, think they are beautiful when they feel ugly, remember their wholeness when they’re broken, see past their guilt to their innocence, point them back to who they are when they’re lost.

It is natural for the way we love our boyfriends/girlfriends to change over time. We may not feel the same way later in the relationship as we did in the beginning, and we may not be as forgiving or understanding either.

In the beginning nearly all of us are a little too carefree in how easily we blindly love, because early love can make us act more than a bit foolish. However, when most or all of these acts of love disappear, that’s one of the warning signs to remember when you’re thinking she doesn’t love you anymore.

It seems that men are often much more in-tune with these changes. Yet because the changes can be so excused away so easily they can be hard for anyone to spot and accept when she doesn’t love you anymore.

It’s important to recognize that just as relationships change over time, expressions of love do too. As easy as it is to explain away the lack of loving gestures, it can be just as easy to read too much into the lack of them as well. Sometimes the normal ups and downs of daily life cause us to overlook and forget to do the small things we used to do that expressed our love.

If you’re truly concerned that she doesn’t love you anymore then there are some particular things to watch out for like insensitivity, lack of caring about you, being overly critical, argumentative, anger, lack of loving acts or words, you no longer seem like someone special or important, There is no forgiveness.

There can be so many understandable reasons for any of these unloving behaviors. If you are seeing these things in your relationship it’s important to remember that it takes time as they say ”true love is built over time”

Before you determine that she no longer loves you, spend some time considering your own behavior. Are you displaying any of the same things? One thing that’s true in all relationships is that we react to each other.

Angry behavior by one person is often met with angry behavior by the other. So it’s important to make sure that you aren’t actually part of the problem before you determine that it’s all her.

If these behaviors become persistent, however, and you are confident that you are doing your part, you need to start seriously considering that these may be signs that she doesn’t love you anymore.

That doesn’t mean that you can’t get the love back, it will just take time, effort and work on both of your parts. It does help to get the viewpoint of an unbiased, objective person when you’re trying to make this important determination, so consider relationships counseling before you decide it’s over is key.

Ending things isn’t a decision to make alone!


Frank Byaruhanga is a human rights activist with years of experience in community dialogues, digital communication, advocacy and digital campaigns. He specializes in Media Relation Work, Management and Training with sufficient knowledge in Governance, Accountability, Sexual Reproductive Health and Rights, Youth-led research, Content developer, Creative Activism, Social Media Management and documentary photography.

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