So this is week five of the Lockdown, self-isolation. I look through the news to see when this will all pass but there are no clear answers
Lately, I have read small hints about the neighbouring country (Kenya) starting to open up few businesses again and it is relieved to see that one day we will stabilize but there is another part that maybe we won’t ever be able to go back to normal again
Some of us have dealt with fear and staying in the house for weeks without doing anything is scary like who holds tomorrow. Sometimes, I pretend to be busy in my room and when I hear my neighbours outside talking have a reason to not panic
During the day, I can go out and talk to people not for long and if I have to be around people for more than a few hours I have to pretend that everything is normal. This last and current month has been different. In some ways, it’s also wonderful therapy because this forced lock-down has given me time to take a deep breath and assess
The self-distancing and social isolation came in handy way in our lives and for the first time, most of my friends also felt isolated and scared
I suspect many of us are like this, sudden experts in dealing with constant fear, sadness and isolation. The introverts feel somehow better during this time and think about the extroverts now? It makes sense though for staying home in the Pandemic fight
We are constantly afraid and feeling dread for something that isn’t going to finish us all, well, it can, it has the power to finish if we don’t adhere to the Ministry of Health guidelines and as citizens, we have the ability to stop it.
Now with something real to focus on it can be a sort of relief and we can use this time to recover from so many worldly things. The fact is; no one is immune to fear.
So I wait for the day when the country reopens and I have hope that it will be better, one day. my only worry is that my (our) fear will be worse and the country will go on without some of us-deep down I know that it’s more than that. Don’t you think so?
It feels stupid to talk about the fear of not being able to leave your house when you literally aren’t allowed to leave your house anyway, but still, it’s what’s going on in my head and maybe it’s going on in yours too. There’s something to be said about not being alone even in isolation.
I remind myself that I have always escaped my broken brain before. I have fought, I have won and then lost- fought and won again. It’s a cycle. One that even those without mental illness, depression can recognize.
We are all fighting, failing and thriving and barely surviving and then starting all over again. We will get through this. This part and the next and the next and we’ll take what we’ve learned and used it. And that’s how life continues
Let us keep fighting. Let us keep praying. We are all in this together and don’t forget to call or text your friends. Wash your hands. Stay at home.