Yesterday evening as I was walking around my neighbourhood, I met a young lady standing outside a black gate just a few meters away from my place, and this young lady was sobbing and cursing the man who was standing next to her, she was so angry with him and judging by the way she was moving her body and the expressions on her face while yelling at the man, you could tell that she almost wanted to beat him up.
Out of curiosity and concern, I decided to stop, of course, I was scared like what if the man beats me up. The man was giving the girlfriend a deaf ear and trying his best to avoid the fight, I could not tell what sparked up the heated conversation between the two love birds but had to ask both of them as a concerned citizen
In this COVID-19 pandemic lockdown, we have really seen a painful impact on people’s relationships and those that are married. Long story short, this young lady had walked all the way from her place in Najjera to the boyfriend’s place in Makindye. It was a surprise visit to the boyfriend whom she had already introduced to her parents, yes, I think they are like husband and wife though they are not staying together.
It was unfortunate for her that when she landed at her boyfriend’s place, she found him with another woman staying together, the other lady was even preparing dinner; the braveness in her. At the moment, I had no quick answer, I kept quiet for a while. Looked at the guy and the lady who was in tears.
With no practical relationship experience, I boldly told the guy to go to the police station and report himself. Of course, the situation wasn’t going to calm down if the guy had remained at home with two women; successfully, the guy went to the police station alone. I’m sure y’all asking yourselves why there was no fight, the guy played it cool and realized his ‘mistake’
This situation got me thinking about the so many stories circulating on social media, radio stations of how couples are fighting with each other on issues like unfaithfulness, character differences, sex-related issues to mention but a few and we all be reminded that the cases of Gender-based violence are high in the lockdown period
Here we are, staying together in the same house right from the time we rise up in the morning until when we get to sleep later in the night. For some couples, it’s a blessing in a disguise because this has provided them with the opportunity to know their partners better while some it’s a rough road since there has been an inevitable change in the usual patterns of husbands coming home late only to find their wives are already asleep, or I’m just thinking out loud, well, you have read the stories too in Newspapers, watched the news on TVs, listened to the radios
Partners have been avoiding each other over the weekends by hanging out with their friends in bars, birthday parties or choosing to work on Saturdays all because one is avoiding to be faced with a situation where they can easily get into a fight.
Adapting to all these changes has been challenging to some people which has led to the rise of other challenges like domestic violence, stress, depression and sexual abuse in homes.
Despite the challenges we may be having in relationships/marriages, as human beings, we still have to find ways of living together in harmony and acknowledge the fact that we are different from John Gray in his book “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus”.
He Said; a man’s intimacy circle is like a rubber band (he gets intimately close, then pulls away to regain his autonomy and then gets close again) while women, on the other hand, are like waves (when she feels loved her wave rises with high self-esteem but her mood can suddenly change which causes her wave to crush down with feelings of emptiness that need to be filled up with love).understanding this cycles is very key to all relationships because then we are able to avoid getting frustrated.
Right now, I can’t tell if the guy is still at Police station or not but I know is that his ‘girlfriend’ went back to her place in Najjera. Before the lockdown ends, I will update on how far with the two
Don’t forget to wash your hands. Wearing a face mask is key